What You Say Is Way Too Complicated

My parents had to put our dog to sleep earlier this year. I was sad when I heard. I was in my early 20s when Dad brought her home. She was homeless and wild and would bolt out the door anytime it was opened for more than a second. But once she realized that was home and they would always provide her with food and comfort? She settled down and became a groovy little dog. It was weird to not see her when I was home. And it was sad when I went to her grave they made for her at my Granny's house. And I just felt like I needed to mention that.

While I was home I photographed a wedding. For money! I was paid to take photos. Which, is weird. And I really didn't like it. And now that I'm editing the photos, it's like...a chore. It's not how I usually feel when I'm going through and editing and working on photos that I wanted to take. Which, naturally, made me believe that anytime something I love becomes a "job" it takes away the joy. But, that can't be. People say all the time that you should do what you love! Find a job that will allow you to do that! And so maybe I just don't love doing wedding photos. And that I'd be happier if someone paid me to take photos for them at the zoo. Or of their flower gardens. Or take candids of them and their friends and / or family at an event they want documented. Things of that sort make me happy. It's looser. It's funner. It's more off the cuff and not so defined. And I like that. Not so much the wedding photos. But now I know. This is how you figure these things out.

I have a long list of little piddly crap things I have to take care of and it's adding up and driving me crazy. I need to package up a bunch of shit and mail it. I need to make CDs. I need to finish editing the wedding photos I was paid to do. I need to clean my kitchen. I need to change the sheets on my bed. I need to get my dogs' nails trimmed. I need to brush my Golden. I need to clean my bathroom. I need to mail my Dad a key to my place. I need to send people directions to the meetup tomorrow. I need to do my actual job. I need to vaccuum. I need to balance my checkbook. I need to take out the trash. I need to buy a few cards to go in the packages. I need to buy shoes for the wedding. I need to mail my dress to Randi so it's not all wrinkley from the flight. I need more time!

Yeah. Not so much. Maybe I just needed to make a list. Yeah. And now you see my list. My blog has become a glorified list. I should pack it in...