Then I Thought Nothing Is Right

While driving about in the world the other day, I had my radio on, as people tend to do when in the car and their CD player is busted. It was while sitting at a stop light listening to a commercial for some product that I do not recall that I learned something. I learned that the rules of dating, of being boyfriend/girlfriend, have changed quite a bit since I was last in that type of situation.

I cannot for the life of me recall what the product is that commercial was for. I'm so wrapped up in the details of the script to really focus on what they were trying to sell me. All I know is this: during the commercial a dude character asked a female character to please take him back. And the female character declined this request. Why? Because he apparently put pudding in her hot tub.

Ummmm.....what?!?!?

First off, is pudding really that detrimental to the health of a hot tub? I can't imagine that it is. Pudding is delicious. And I imagine that if in hot water it would break down quite nicely and not really do too much damage to the filters and whatnots. I doubt the man put $240 worth of pudding in there. So, really...pudding in a hot tub. OK.

Secondly, is putting pudding in a hot tub really a fireable offense? Honestly? Is this the rule now? Somebody puts a bit of pudding in my hot tub, I can tell 'em to hit the road? Pudding in a hot tub is such a horrendous ordeal to live through that you can get rid of a relationship and not even talk about a reconciliation? You can just dump and never look back? Really?

So, what other silly damned rules are there that I may not be aware of? You drop a marshmallow in the floor of my car and I leave you on the side of the road? You take a sip of my chocolate milkshake so I call the cops? I can't even think of scenarios as ridiculous as pudding in a hot tub. I don't even have a hot tub. But, I need to know! I need to know if shit has actually gotten this stupid out there.

Yeah...